You see a cute pet, I see a Salmonella factory, Hollywood edition: a petting zoo for Brangelina’s kids?

I don’t understand the allure of celebrity.

Jessica Alba was on Good Morning America this morning, flogging some eco-baby crap; it’s good to have a second career when you suck at your current one (acting).

It’s just a rumor, but Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have, according to the Sun, built their children a small petting zoo that includes goats, llamas, geese, goldenglobe 9 120109ducks, bantam chickens, emus and lop-eared rabbits.

“Maddox and Pax are safari mad and they wanted Brad to buy them lions and tigers, even crocodiles,” the source said. “Brad decided to go with a mini farm/petting zoo theme that the twins, Knox and Vivienne, can enjoy looking after as well. They’re in a penned-off area in a field with little huts that the animals live in.”

That’s sweet. And I’m all for kids learning to look after kids. But only with an understanding that nature can be harsh and brutal, and that dangerous microorganisms don’t care that you’re celebrity spawn.

A table of petting zoo outbreaks is available at