50 shades of barf

Jamie Dornan was left vomiting after auditioning to star alongside Tom Cruise in Rock of Ages.

fifty-shades-grey-movie-release-dateThe 32-year-old, who plays Christian Grey in Fifty Shades of Grey, was left mortified after an attempt to boost his confidence before an audition backfired.
Jamie was hoping to land the lead role of Drew Boley and was tasked with performing a Foreigner song.

He said: “I had to sing Waiting For A Girl Like You. It’s nearly impossible to sing, and I’ve got quite a deep voice when I sing.

“My audition was at 10 in the morning on the Warner Brothers lot. I convinced myself it would be a good idea to have a bit of whiskey to relax my vocal cords and maybe as a bit of a confidence booster. I took a swig of Jameson and I instantly f**king puked.
“So I’m standing with all these executives driving around in golf carts, as I’m vomiting on the lot. It was a bad look.

“I hadn’t been clever enough to bring mouthwash. And then I had to go in, stinking of whiskey and vomit and proceed to sing Waiting For A Girl Like You, which I couldn’t sing.”

“It was the worst situation ever,” he added. “Obviously, I didn’t hear anything back.”

Alcohol fraud: bottles sold to tourists contained urine, feces for color

I’m not much of a hard liquor drinker but I’m sure there’s a cheap-whiskey-tastes-like-piss joke in here somewhere.

According to DailyMail.com a fraudster in the tourist town of Blackpool, UK has been arrested after selling bottles filled with flat cola or water colored with urine and feces. Awesome.

A conman was branded a danger to public health after he was caught selling bottles filled with urine as whisky to tourists.

Nicholas Stewart was arrested after he was seen trying to sell the one and a half litre bottles of fake whisky and vodka to holidaymakers for £10, a court heard.

Scientific analysis revealed some drinks merely contained flat cola but in others they found evidence of human waste.670px-Pee-in-a-Bottle-Step-4

Blackpool Council prosecutor Victoria Cartmell said the drinks had probably been laced with faeces and urine to give the colour of whisky.

The 35-year-old, from Blackpool, was spared jail for the sickening offence and was handed a 70 day jail term suspended for 12 months after he admitted fraud.

The bottles were seized by security staff when Stewart was seen approaching customers in the massive Coral Island slot machine complex.

Dry hands are 1,000 times safer than damp hands; or so say PR types

What Would Don Draper Do? He’d reject the crappy ad copy, leave it to his underlings if necessary, and walk away. After a large glass of whiskey.

Mike Kapalko, SCA Tissue`s Environmental & Tork Services Manager says,

"Our hands touch 300 different surfaces every 30 minutes. And, according to the CDC, up to 40 percent of Americans could contract the H1N1 virus through 2010.
So properly washing and, equally important, effectively drying your hands is a simple way of dramatically decreasing your risk of being infected. As a leader in
hygienic solutions, Tork provides businesses and consumers with handwashing resources such as posters and educational videos through our website."

The press release says damp hands spread 1,000 times more germs than dry hands2.

This is the reference:

2Patrick, D.R., Findon, G., Miller, T.E., Epidemiology and Infection

That’s not a reference.

“It is therefore as important to dry your hands as it is to wash them carefully with soap and warm water.”

Nah, water temperature doesn’t matter much either.

How hard is it to get it right?